Christmas

Well, the day started off a lot earlier than we planned. Mercedes woke up and went downstairs and started into presents before we were awake. We decided to all get up and see what Santa left for us. Both of the kids were happy, especially with the candy. Mason wouldn't eat breakfast after eating all of the candy we would let him have.

After breakfast we finished opening presents. The kids seemed happy with theirs. Derek and I are also happy. I got a massage bed rest (with heating option), and Derek got two nice watches and a new pair of sunglasses he has been wanting. Plus the things from other friends and family. The really nice part is getting to sit at home and relax with each other. We don't have to go anywhere. Dinner is pretty simple this year, and the plan is to eat around 3. All in all a good day.

Right now, everyone else is taking a nap. Yep, the house is quiet. I don't know what to do : )

Micah is playng off and on, but that's ok, I like to know he's busy in there. Tomorrow marks week 22. The ultrasound confirmed another baby boy. Now if we can make it to April, all will be well.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

News of the Week

Derek is out of school right now. He got XMAS lights hung up outside, and is going to start wrapping presents this week. He's got some other things to take care of too, but nothing pressing.

I was in San Antonio this week for some meetings. I really miss San Antonio! It felt like I was home. What a great city.

Overal, we are all doing well. No one has been extremely sick for a while (knock on wood), and the baby and I are doing well.

In fact, the baby is pretty active several times a day. I thought I started feeling kicks around week 14 or so, but now that we are at week 19, I know I am being kicked. That's good though, since it means the baby is maturing in there. We will find out the gender in a few weeks, so that will also be cool. We have a few names we have been kickng around but nothing confirmed.

We are all done with Christmas shopping! Yea! I hate waiting until the last minute. This means I can start worrying about next years presents : )

11/15

I am officially irritated now. I just lost the post I spent the last5 minutes working on.

Michelle and Brittney will be here all week next week. YEA! We are all looking forward to that. And our neighbers are coming over to share Thanksgiving with us. Double Yea! And I see the OB DR next week. Kinda Yea!

Why Kinda yea? Well, after 5 miscarriages, I am neurotic when it comes to being pregnant. I worry that I will go to the appt and be told that they can't find the heartbeat. Not good. It's hard not to have those thoughts in the middle of the night when you wake up. Don't ask me why. I am trying to stay positive (and busy) so it doesn't become too bad, but in the quiet moments, it's hard. I did think I felt a good solid kick this last weekend, so that was kind of cool. We aren't at the point where I will feel it much, or on a regular basis, so nothing unusual about not feeling anything since, though I would appreciate it : )

Mason had to go to the DR (ER) yesterday. Daycare called in a tizzy about a rash he had which was NOTHING. I spent two hours in the ER, one of which Mason was ANGRY (he threw a fit for over an hour) and another hour in a doctors office to get a note telling the daycare that there is NOTHING wrong. By the way, they thought he had hand, foot, and mouth disease. Sounds nice, doesn't it?

Derek is in Finals this week and it appears he will pass, possible with A's in one or all of his classes. He's not taking anything else until January, so he will be able to re-charge and re-group, we hope : ) He's hoping to go back to martial arts next month also. I don't know how that will go, but it can't hurt.

I am starting a Master's online in January. It's in Security Management. I think it will work very well with my other Master's degree. And if everything works out, I might continue to do online Master's degrees for a while. Perhaps a degree in Forensic Pschology for S&Gs. No, I am not compeltely nuts, I just like school, and I just as well do something I like after I have been responsible.

Reasons to like/hate the military

Reasons to Love being in the Military1.) You get to live in interesting places (Germany, Japan, Australia,England, Italy)2.) You get to move after a couple of years3.) If you don't like your supervisor, wait a year or two and you'llhave a new one4.) Making new friends5.) Unique and interesting jobs6.) You don't have to live at home with your parents7.) Guaranteed healthcare and paycheck8.) College tuition paid in full9.) You don't have to figure out what to wear every day10.) All Federal Holidays off11.) Retire after 20 years with a paycheck
Downside to Military Life1.) Long deployments2.) You have to leave your friends3.) You have to move every couple of years4.) You can't quit5.) Early hours6.) Assignments to Korea7.) Long duty hours8.) Inspections9.) Rules for EVERYTHING10.) Congressman decide our pay
Ok, these aren't inclusive, and they are purely my opinion, but I had towork to get some of the downsides. If you have any suggestions, let meknow and I will add them.
We are now fully ready for Halloween, Oh, except for the flower forMercedes costume. Instead of a bride (no veils), we got her a black,cream, and gold cat mask. It matches the dress pretty well, so I thinkshe will look cute, and original. Alexis got the makeup and jewelry forher Burgundy slayer outfit, so she's happy. I am not even going toattempt make-up for Mason with his Itsy Bitsy Spider costume. He'd bethe Itsy Bitsy blob.
Derek invited the neighbors over last night for brisket. I think it wasa nice night and went well. The kids seemed to have fun, though theyended the night yelling and jumping on one of the beds. The food waspretty good, particularly the sugar cookies. There is something reallyaddictive about sugar cookies, you know? The house still looks prettygood too. We got it to the point of being presentable over the weekend,and it does look pretty good. Mason's room is destroyed though. Andours is in desperate need of help. I am going to work on that thisweek. There are boxes that still need to be emptied, so I am going toTRY to do that.
Tonight is my bowling night. Yea?! I am already beat, so there is nottelling how I am going to be by this evening. I have a conference to goto for the next three days, too, so that ought to be fun. No rest forthe wicked I suppose.
Tomorrow is the official 12 week point for Baby number 3 (8). Sigh - Iam having the usual anxiety. Why am I not feeling disgustingly sick?Did I lose the baby again? Why are my symptoms not the same as theywere yesterday? Was that a pain in my abdomen? I really try not tostress, but I don't do so well with that most days.
Derek is doing better with school, though he's still having troublegetting motivated to study like he should. Maybe after the XMAS breakthings will be better. We aren't planning to travel anywhere, so wewon't be stressed about that. He should be able to relax a bit, and bythat time, maybe his leg will be doing better. I think he's pretty muchdecided to hold off from the neck surgery for a while since the kneesurgery has really been a bear to work through.

Busy Weekend

We had a busy weekend. We went bowling on Friday and Saturday night, and then on Sunday spent the day trying to work around the house. I found the couch beneath the three weeks worth of laundry that I needed to fold. I am now down to the last few loads of this weeks laundry, so I am feeleing pretty good. We also found the kitchen counter, so that was also good.

I took the opportunity to sleep in this morning, since for me this is a holiday. It was a nice thing to not get out of bed until after 10. Mason generally has me up before 7 or 8. If I can sleep until 8, it's a "late" morning. I guess that's why I go to bed so early. I know I will be up early.

I think we are finally firming up our dates for our Disney trip next year. The baby is due in late April/early May, so he/she will be several months old when we finally go. We plan to go with Michelle and Brittney and it will be Derek's graduation gift.

Derek made the decision to slow down and stop stressing himself out with school. He would have to take 4 classes a term (including this one). With everything else going on that was just too much stress. He's now going to plan on graduating at the end of the summer term.

I caught a cold when I was in DC last week and I am still trying to get rid of it. Having the cough and the accompaniying crud is really annoying when I have so many other things to worry about. I think it's going away though, just slower than I want.

We are enjoying the new Durango, but I am hoping it is worth it. I still believe the truck and car were going to end up costing us more than the truck Durango does now. Sigh - decisions decisions.

And that's the gist of our information. I know, the same things over and over, but it sure keeps us busy : )

I think everyone has their Halloween costumes now. Alexis is going to be a Burgundy Slayer. Mercedes is going as a bride, and Mason is the Itsy Bitsy Spider. Very cute. Hopefully it will be a nice evening out so I don't freeze anything off since I think it's my year to take them around.

9/22

I am leaving on Sunday for a few days in DC. No, it's not a vacation, but a conference. Though I intend to relax as much as possible. Derek will have the kids by himself, so hopefully everyone will still be alive when I get home.

Derek is still having trouble with his knee and the doctor keeps telling him it's normal, don't worry abount it. Yea, right, it's not your knee. He keeps hopeing that in the end this will be worthwhile.

We got rid of the truck and car last weekend and got a 2006 Dodge Durango. THe gas mileage is not as good as the car, but there are other benefits. Like we aren't going to have to have several thosand dolalrs of work done to it in the next two years. It's the little things like that that make me appreciate it.

Alexis earned her next belt at martial arts and oculd possible be a black belt before we leave. Wow! We also got her mid-term grades back this week and she got 3 A's and 2 B's. She is hopnig to get all A's so she can be on the Honor Roll. I am really proud of her and how well she's doing.

Mercedes earned a stripe in martial arts this week so if she keeps it up she should be able to test in November. She's more of a social butterfly than the others, so she is not progressing as fast. THat's alright though, she will get there in her time.

Mason is fine. He had a temperature the other day which was nothing to worry about . He's pretty mobile now so we are busy keeping him out of trouble. He's a happy baby overall and easy to deal with. A lover not a fighter. He got bit at school again, but he doesn't have any after effects that we can see.

Derek is knee deep in school now and grumbling about homework. He's taking four classes, so there's plenty of it. I don't miss that at all.

Shoot, I need to go eat my breakfast and go to work, There is never enough time in the day.

This week in the news

This week was pretty quiet for us overall. A couple of Doctor's appts, but nothing to worry about. I am taking Mason tomorrow to get his ears done (tubes) and Mercedes for a follow up on her ears. I am hoping all goes well. Derek also has his first physical therapy appt tomorrow. I REALLY hope that goes well. He's been having a lot of pain and right now we are afriad it might be infected. Hope not though.

I am going to DC in a few weeks for a conference so I am looking forward to that. No telling how the trip will be though. DC is always a toss up for me. I am hoping it's good though. If nothing else it mixes things up a bit.

Well, Alexis is up, though not compeltely awake. She had a friend spend the night and they stayed up late. Derek made her get up early, probably to be onery. I guess it's a Dad thing, since Dad just to do that to me.

That's about it for us. We lead a pretty quiet life these days : )

Here we go again

Well, it looks like this next week woll be full as well. Mason has two Drs appts, Derek has Drs appts, I have Drs appts. Maybe we should just hire our own private dr : )

As soon as the bruises heal up, Derek should be better. For now though, they are very painful, so he's trying to stay off of his leg. He's more mobile, but nowhere near 100%. He thinks he will be ok to start school on Tuesday, but that will probably be the extent of what he can do for a week or so.

Overall though, I think things are going to calm down. At this point they have too. Not much else can go wrong for us.

On Friday morning, we woke up to about 1/2 inch of water flooding our bedroom, and the kitchen light and vents pouring water. It seems the master bathroom decided to flood. Not fun, at all. THe maintenace guys came right out and did what they could, but they are going to have to come back to fix the kitchen light, and the bathroom and bedroom floors. Plus, we are throwing a lot of things out, and trying to get the smell out. I have an extra 5 loads of laundry too, since a lot of things got wet, upstairs and down.

Work is quiet right now. We are changing duties around now. We have some new people and it makes sense. The boss also wants us to taje on more internal work instead of farming our money out to other people. The return on invenstment isn't there I guess.

Gotta go, Derek needs me.

Long Weekend

Well, it's a good thing it's along weekend becuase it looks like I will be cleaning up the house. I don't mean the normal, laundry, dishes, unpack boxes from the move type of thing, I mean water damage from the leak that started about 0430 this morning and the maintenance guys still haven't shown up to fix (0630). Yea, that just makes my whole day so much brighter.

Other than that, I think we are all fine. Derek got his bandages off yesterday and his leg is still there. I still contend that he is a big baby. He swears he will NEVER have another surgery. Yea, I don't foresee that happening.

I was cruising through my (daily when I am not out-the-door busy) blog reading, and one of them had a really good game (dice Wars). It is not quite an addiction, but it's fun!

I need to go and get the little people off to school.

The MOVE

We are pretty much through "the move". I mainain that we will NOT be doing this on our own again. I can deal with unpacking boxes, but the actual moving everything on our own is not something I even want to contemplate. I will pay (through the nose if I have too) to have someone do the heavy lifting and transfer to a new house. I will, I swear it! I like the military doing the moving for me, I am spoiled! I admit it. And Karen, I think I would have to kill the landlord!

Other than the pain of moving (and the muscle pain and bruises), we are good. I will be unpacking boxes for a while, but overall, it's not too bad. The painting we did looks pretty good and makes it feel more homey. I don't know that I would want to do that a lot, but it definitely helps.

It's going to take a few weeks for Derek (and I) to recover healthwise. Derek is having alot of problems because of the heavy lifting, lack of sleep, and general business of the move. I am coming down with a cold (probably from not taking care of myself for the past week, and I've got all of the sore muscles too. Ugg!

I will try to get some pictures taken to share with everyone once the chaos is under control (if that ever happens). In the emantime, just think of bubble gum pink for Mercedes room, country blue for the master bedroom, and a country to khaki green for Alexis. All three colors are nice and good for the person (people) who sleep in that room. The living room was a pain in the butt. We spent way more time than originally planned painting and repainting it. All I Can say is DO NOT choose a red or dark pink color unless you intend to paint it 3 or 4 times. We ended up painting about 3 times and putting a fauz finish on to make it look alright. And it does look nice. And there is SO much more room in the house overall. Granted, we have made a serious effort to get rid of "stuff", but part of it is that the layout of the house is slightly better.

Next weekend Derek and I are taking off for our romantic weekend in Cincinnati. I hope it turns out well. No stress, relaxation.

I hate packing!

Have I mentioned I hate packing? I REALLY hate packing! And to add to the fun, we are going to paint. Ok, yes, I agreed to paint. And yes, I am excited to have a slightly pigger house, and YES, I think paint will make it look homier, but geez, that's a lot of work. AND you know I am LAZY!

We start moving in on Friday. That means we should have the keys to the house by 5:00 pm on Friday from our experience with housing. We are hiring the neighborhood kids to help us move starting on Saturday. $20 and all the pizza you can eat. I figure one day should get the bulky stuff moved, the rest is going to be boxes and misc stuff. And a lot of stuff will be going to the thrift store or storage. We are going to take this opportunity to re-organize our lives and start new. Hope it works.

I am sponsoring in a new LT. She's brand new (still shiny) to the AF, but super sweet. She's replacing the LT who I work with (and I think we are friends) so I won't be all alone. She's already found a place to live (I swear I did not mean to find a place her second day here that was EXACTLY what she wanted and needed). It's a bit more that she wanted in terms of price, but it's two bedrooms so it's doable for her. And there are lots of amenities.

Oh, back to the painting, we are going to do the living room in a wine color, Alexis room in a not quite pastel green (I love it),Mercedes in Barbie pink, and our room in a conservative mediu, blue. I am so excited.

We are going out to eat tonight, so I need to get busy filling up boxes (did I mention that I hate moving?). I didn't realize how many books I have. BUt I refuse to part with most of them. They're mine, mine, I tell ya.

Chaos

If you know us, you already know we live in chaos, complete and utter chaos, but it works, so we keep doing it.

We found out this week that Mercedes is going to get tubes in her ears in a couple of weeks. No real worries there.

Derek is going to have surgery on his knee in mid August during his break from school. It should give him enough time to get somewhat back on his feet and then start back to school a few weeks later.

We also found out (finally) that we can move into a four bedroom house on the same street we already live on. It's not a nicer house, but it is slightly bigger, which is important.

That's pretty much going to take care of the month of August for us. But hopefully these are all good things. At least I am looking at them as good things. No more ear infections for Mercedes, Derek can walk again, and we will have a little bit more room to expand out chaos into. What more could we ask for?

US

Derek really needs to go to the doctor! His neck is causing him all sorts of problems, so the sooner he can get the surgery he requires the better. It's becoming more and more of an issue all of the time. We are hoping he can have the surgery soon. One of his doctors told him that having the surgery on his neck would probably clear up a lot of the other problems, like his back.

Derek starts back to school a week from tomorrow. He's not looking forward to it, but he's only got 3 or 4 more terms to go, so he wants to finish up. The big thing is keeping his grades up so his GPA is good. Right now he's got a 3.1, so it's pretty good. Derek would like it to be better, but I think if he stays over 3.0 he's doing better than most.

We are going to start getting the kids ready for school in the next month. Sigh! I don't think it's going to be too bad in terms of supplies and clothes, though I can't be sure. Alexis is telling me all she needs are tennis shoes, and I think Mercedes is about the same. As it gets colder they will need more stuff, but for now, shoes and school supplies seems to be it.

We went looking for business clothes for Derek today. It's going to hurt having to buy him clothes for job interviews and jobs. I hope it's worth it. I think we will be buying gradually for the smaller stuff, but it's going to be a big outlay for the suit and sports coats. Sigh! I really hope that Derek gets a job where he can dress casually. That would be nice. Really Nice!

We are talking about getting pregnant again. We have been seeing a specialist to try and avoid the miscarriage trap again. We (I) hope everything works out this time. My only real fear is that it will be twins, other than losing the baby. The fear of miscarriage is always going to be with me I think.

I am working mids this week for a special event on base. It's a high visibility position and not too bad to have on my record. I am glad I am working mids versus days or swings, though. They are getting the bulk of the taskings. We are just here to answer phones and handle a few details throughout the night. Lucky me, I am the shift leader for my crew, so I am "responsible". Scary, huh?

Question 4 U

Does it mean there is something wrong with me if I am playing Chicken Invaders for hours at a time?

6/22

Well, Brittney goes home on Monday so I think things will calm down a little then. In the meantime, we have Paramount King’s Island this weekend. We have been meaning to go, but have just never made it. I hope its fun. I imagine the kids will be happy either way. It’s the adults in the crowd who will need a break! I figure I will be going on a fair amount of the rides too. I actually really enjoy riding roller coasters and stuff, so it won’t be a burden.
We can chalk up two more ER visits this week. Mercedes woke up in the middle of the night on Monday and I took her in. I thought it was an asthma attack, but the doctor said it is Croup. She’s continuing to have problems, but we have not taken her back in. The doctor said we should if she had any more attacks, but it hasn’t seemed necessary. It’s just hard on us. The second ER visit was for Derek. He was having more problems with his back so he went in and they gave him Vicodin and Valium. They also think he has pneumonia, so he’s on anti-biotics.
Mason has another ear infection as well, so he’s also on anti-biotics. He’s not too happy about it, but if it will get rid of whatever is going on, I don’t care. This is the third one in a short period of time so it’s getting to be a real pain in the behind. He gets high fevers and is fussy and lethargic which really bothers us. He’s a lot more fun when he feels good.
Alexis and Brittney seem to be healthy which is a blessing. They have been helping me out by folding clothes and giving Derek a hand around the house. We got swim passes for them, but they haven’t used them yet so I hope they get to use them soon. If nothing else, maybe they can go to the pool on Saturday and get out of my hair : )
The girls asked for coloring books this week, so went to the store last night and picked some up. Then we spent an hour or two coloring last night. We even had the TV turned off if you can believe that. I think we all enjoyed ourselves, though I didn’t ask. It was something new for us though. The night before we had the TV off and were playing board games. Mercedes won, of course. I won’t say she cheats, but I think we are more lenient with her. I think a game of UNO is in order.
There have been a lot of deployment opportunities coming down, but I have not volunteered for any. I have been tempted though. My Major’s board is next year and it would not hurt to have a deployment under my belt before then, but Derek doesn’t think it would be a good idea. He’s on his last year of school, so me being gone right now would cause him a lot of problems. I could still go in January 2007, though, and that’s without volunteering. In some ways, I would just like a change of pace. Deployments remind me of why I am in the Air Force.

Go Cheerios!

He's quiet for a minute, so we'll see how far I get.

I took three days off to be with Derek after his surgery, which he didn't have. THe neurosurgeon would not clear him. In fact, this neurosurgeon he saw wants him to see a more specialized neurosugeon in Cincinnati. And he thinks Derek should have the surgery in the next 6 months. Lovely.

Derek has the next month off to rest and get his bearings back. Hopefully it will recharge his batteries. We've both been running on empty, so maybe if one of us can get caught back up, the other will follow suit.

We got pictures of the kids on Friday. I am going to post them so if you want to see how beautiful everyone looked you can click on the links to the right. As always, I think the kids are amazing.

Home Again Home Again

I survived and I am not broke : ) I got cinnamon bread, sciabatta, and a crusty italian loaf. Plus I got amish butter and somekind of horseradish cheese spread. PLUS, there were these two absolutely gorgeous tomatoes. 2 1/2 lbs worth! Derek and Brittney will be thrilled, I hope.

Yes, it was fun. I am such an open air market junkie. I also got fresh flowers! I so miss having fresh flowers on a regular basis. And they had Iris. I love IRIS!

Goin' to the market

There's a market in Dayton, Ohio and I'm going. It's Saturday morning before 0800 and I am awake and I'm going to the Farmer's market. I am going to eat breakfast there at one of those little specialty shops and I am going to enjoy it. I am going to buy foccacia bread and cinnamon bread that someone else worked very hard on, and I am going to love it. I am going to leave all of the kids home with Derek and I am going to love that too. I do not feel guilty about this - at all.

I went through a whole week of no ER visits. We did find out that Derek will NOT be having knee surgery. His neurosurgeon says no general anethesia AND Derek needs the neck surgery in the next 6 months AND he won't do it. The neurosurgeon wants Derek to go to someone who specializes in rheumatology and surgery. Yeesh - how specialized can you get? I'm sorry Ma'am, I can only work on your big toe on your right foot every other Tuesday at 0900? No freaking wonder it costs so much to go to the doctor.

We (the kids and I) went to Kansas last weekend. Of course, for whatever reason, I was sick! Yea, that made the trip so muchmore fun. We went and visited Mom, who, by the way, I REALLY miss! We left her flowers which does not seem adequate, but it's the best we could do. We also went to Boothill Museum. Yes, there really is a Boothill in Dodge City, KS. We saw the gunfight,a te a chuckwagon dinner, and saw the variety show with Can Can Dancers at the LongBranch Saloon. The kids had a ball. The van we rented worked out very well for us, and would be something to consider again int he future. Of course it would only be for shorter trips. The cost would kill us for anything more that 4 or 5 days.

We have a busy weekend planned. Today we are going to get our hair cut. All of us! Oh yea, we have 3 hours set aside for that alone. From there, we are coming home for a neighborhood shrimp bake. That ought to be fun. We might go see XMEN III if we can get away early enough. Tomorrow we have a birthday party, a soccer game and then we are going horseback riding. We are gonna be beat once we get home!

My ride is here, so have a LOVELY day!

It happened again

Monday started out like any other week. I went to work, I was merrily plodding my way through e-mail when Derek calls. He needs me to take him to the ER. He hurt his arm a few days before and it got progressively worse to the point where he could not lift a 24 oz bottle of soda without being in extreme pain. THe doctors answer (after 3 hours of waiting)? A muscle tear or strain, here's some Vicodin it will heal on it's own.

OK, I can deal with that. Tuesday, Derek can't take Mason to his weel-baby checkup, so off I go,, 1 year old in tow. Doctor says he looks great, everything is fine., ut we have an ear infection Go get immunizations (know tonights gonna suck), oh, and they want blood to check for lead. The shots were bad enough, but they couldn't find the vein the first time, so they poked his little finger and squeezed. Then we had to deal with the pharmacy. I took the rest of the day off since it was 3 hours later before we got home. That night he started running a fever, which was normal since he usually does when he has had shots. The combination of shots and ear infection amde his fever shoot up. We thought he had gone down enough to go to school the next day, but he started spiking (103.8, 104.0, 104.8 under the arm). Derek got him and I met him at the ER, with Mercedes who also had an ear infection. After several hours and a double dose (Tylenol and Motrin at the same time) of meds to bring his fever down (103.8 rectal), we went home.

The same day as the second ER visit, Mercedes was seen for an ear infection. We try to catch them early to avoid fevers for her. THe results can be traumatic if we don't. I also had my follow-up which was not really worth it, though the doctor was 30 minutes behind in getting to me. We did find out that there is STILL no reason for us to lose our babies. They could find nothing wrong with Shane or I. Great! That made us feel so much better. We will be seeing the specialist again before we try again. We are giving it until next April, and f we aren't pregnant or have another baby we are both getting fixed. It hurts too much to hope, though the trying is fun.

Derek and I went out on our monthly date on Friday. We went to Saki, no kids, and then to a local bar and played pool and had a couple of drinks. It was fun. It was odd being back in a bar, I haven't been for a while. I liked it though. Next month, Derek gets to plan the date. It will be our 11th anniversary (can you believe that?). In July, we are taking a cooking class together. I think that will be really fun. In August, I am taking Derek to Cincinnati to a luxury hotel where we will have a suite with a hot tub. We will eat at a NICE restaraunt and have breakfast before coming home. We haven't planned for anything after that, but I am sure we will figure it out. Any ideas for future dates are appreciated. We are trying to broaden our horizens. If nothing else, there is the Dublin Pub down town. We might get to hear some Irish folk songs if we pick the right night : )

I am in a training class all of this next week and then I leave on Friday for a trip to Kansas. Derek is not going so it's going to be a LONG drive. I will be taking caffeine through an IV. I rented a mini-van versus taking the truck. It comes out about the same money-wise becuase Derek's truck is so bad on gas. Plus, the van has a dvd system for the kids. I think it will make the trip nicer overall. Plus, I don't need to worry about mechanical issues, if it breaks down they come get me and take care of it.

I realized again this last week or so how much I (we) miss Mom. It's hard to deal with when something happens and your first inclination is to pick up the phone and call - and you realize you can't. I'm not sure that will ever totally go away.

We are all good right now. Everyone is healthy or at least not noticeably sick. Hope it last for a while. I think we know most of the ER docs by name : )

What we are doing

Mason is being mean to Derek again. I think he does it on purpose. They are buddies though.

I survived the first week back, but I think I am having some manic issues (manic-depressive). I think it's just hard for me to deal with people right now. Or maybe that I don't want to.

I go back to the doctor this week. I was supposed to go back next week, but had to re-schedule due to a class. I doubt there will be any new knews, but I have to go. I just want the referral to the specialist, though I am not sure how much help he really was.

Derek survived his mid-terms, he even got some good grades, but he was pretty stressed. To recover, I got someone to watch the kids for a night and took him to a local hotel - just the two of us. Yes, it was nice, but pricey. We are going to go again in August, so maybe it will become a standard end-of-term thing. THe August trip is actually going to be nicer. The hotel is better and all, plus it's in Cincinnati so it's actually out-of-town.

There are a million other things going on, but I don't have time to talk about them all here. Maybe later.

What we are doing

Mason is being mean to Derek again. I think he does it on purpose. They are buddies though.

I survived the first week back, but I think I am having some manic issues (manic-depressive). I think it's just hard for me to deal with people right now. Or maybe that I don't want to.

I go back to the doctor this week. I was supposed to go back next week, but had to re-schedule due to a class. I doubt there will be any new knews, but I have to go. I just want the referral to the specialist, though I am not sure how much help he really was.

Derek survived his mid-terms, he even got some good grades, but he was pretty stressed. To recover, I got someone to watch the kids for a night and took him to a local hotel - just the two of us. Yes, it was nice, but pricey. We are going to go again in August, so maybe it will become a standard end-of-term thing. THe August trip is actually going to be nicer. The hotel is better and all, plus it's in Cincinnati so it's actually out-of-town.

There are a million other things going on, but I don't have time to talk about them all here. Maybe later.

Back to work

I go back to work today. I can't say that I am ready but I can't stay home foreve, though I wish I could. I think, with everything going on, I am just burnt out right now. I just need to do the best I can and try not to get into trouble.

We are going to Kansas for Memorial Day to see everyone. Hopefully it is a safe and uneventful trip. It's going to be a long trip. Derek is saying he might not be going since he has finals the next week. I don't want to drive (with three kids) to Kansas by myself, but we do what we have too.

Mason is now officially a big boy. He's got his first hair cut and is eating big kids food full-tiem now. He's getting bigger and seems to be pretty happy with life.

Mercedes is going through one of those stages. We are trying to get through it, but there are days. . . .

Alexis is busy as usual. We are keeping up, but some days it feels like we are barely doing it.

Derek is waiting to find out when his knee surgery is. They want to make sure his neck won't be a problem, so we have to go see the neurosurgeon first. If it's not one thing, it's another.

thursday?

I think it's Thursday. I kind of lost track of days. Part of it was the narcotics, part of it was just pulling away from life. I suppose I have to get back into the swing of things. I don't want to, but I need to.

What I've learned this week: Mason likes Fruit Loops..

I've been fighting with our car insurance company for two weeks now. I tried to pay them on time, but I had put the wrong account number in. So then I called with the right account number and THEY put the wrong account number in. Two cancellation notices later, we are still trying to get this fixed. Irritating? Yes! Am I going to change auto insurers, no.

How are Derek and I doing? Frustrated, sad, confused, lost. I'm the one who's mostly lost. the rest covers both of us. How do you answer when people ask how you are doing? I'm angry at God, I want to be left alone, I'm on the verge of tears any time you mentione it? It's hard, becuase you can't say those things, or fall apart every five minutes. You can't really say, just don't ask. You know it's becuase people care, but when you hurt, you aren't so good at being polite. Not that I have ever been good at being polite, but it's worse right now.

Mason is ready to go night night, so I guess I should go.

And the answer is

We lost the baby. Not due to the amniocentesis, but sometime between last Friday and this Friday, Shane died. Derek and I are both rpetty shaken up. For right now, they have me prety doped up since they did surgery yesterday.

4/21/06

I go in for my amniocentesis today. Unfortunately, it takes two weeks to get the results back. They can also do a test which is not conclusive but gives a pretty good idea of whether the baby has Down's Syndrome or not. That one takes 2-4 days. We felt it was improtant to do the amniocentesis, even though there is a slight risk of miscarriage. If we know we can be prepared. So far, the results from the two screening tests are mixed, so we don't have a clear picture of what's going on. As things stand now, we have a 1:42 or 1:56 chance of our baby (Shane, it's definitely a boy) having Down's. THose are pretty high odds for someone with my age and history.

My biggest problem is having a REALLY LONG needle stuck into my abdomen near the baby. Did I mention he's an exhibitionist? A lot like his brother. Why me?

Shane is starting to make his presence known. Not a lot, but every once in a while I am almost positive he's moving. I'm 18 weeks now, so it's the right time to start feeling him kick. I just hope he lays off my nerves.

Yesterday was a bit rough for me. A co-worker who was 7 weeks along lost her baby. It reminded me of my last miscarriage. She was having an ultrasound and they couldn't find the heartbeat, even though they could last week. She's devastated. I know the feeling. There's nothing I or anyone can say to help.

Derek i splanning to have surgery on his knee at the end of May. They are going to repair his ACL, so he will be out for a few weeks. Well, not really out, but on crutches. That won't be much fun for any of us.

Mason has some kind of bacterial skin infection. Don't know where he picked it up, but he should be over it by the time he starts daycare next week. He seemed to like the daycare people, so I expect he will be happy.

Alexis started soccer this week. The games are on Sundays so that's not too bad. We haven't hear about the softball yet, but I expect it starts in June or so. She says she likes soccer so far, even though it was a LOT of running.

Mercedes will start t-ball in June. We chose not to put her in soccer since she acted up so much last year. We are hoping she does better with t-ball. We are also taking her out of gymnastics since she doesn't seem to care one way or another. She has asked to go to swimming lessons so we will start back into those after t-ball.

And that's the quick and dirty on our lives.

Let's walk through this together.

I work. Supposedly full-time. I'm pregnant (16 weeks). I support a husband who is supposed to be the house-spouse and 3 (soon to be 4) kids. Why is it then, that my spouse seems to act like he's doing EVERYTHING and every little thing he does is just so freaking huge? I get that he is in school full-time, I do. But rather than use his time wisely, he's always waiting until the last minute, or putting things off. I get the arthritis thing, I really do, but for SOME reason, that never stops him from doing the FUN stuff. And the whole temper thing? Get over it! If you are going to stay up until 2 in the mornng, then be aware you are gonoing to have to get up and get the kids ready whether you feel like it or not, so don't growl at them. AND, if you are going to stay up that late-TURN the freaking TV off and do some hosuework instead of sitting aorund, then complaining later about never having time to get things done. AND STOP minimizing my feelings, both physical and emotional. I get that as a man, no one can ever feel nearly as bad as you, but get over yourself.

Yes, I am ranting, no, you don't need to respond, I just needed to get that off my chest. I've been (deathly ?) ill since Friday. On Saturday I got to visit the ER (temp of 100.7). On Sunday I probably should have visited the ER, but was too stubborn. My temperature was 102.1 to 99.4, depending on if the Tylenol was working. Oh, it was a lovely day, not. I went to the doctor Monday - no temperature. Nice, huh. However, I was finally given something to make the headache go away. Bliss - sheer bliss. Now I am just compeltely exhausted. Today is day 3 of staying at ome trying to sleep (between phone calls, Derek, and children).

I am hoping this illness has not hurt baby, but the temperatures were pretty high and I am just now eating and drinking enough again.I don't think there's anything wrong, but I am slightly neurotic where the baby is concerned. Right now, I am going to go back to bed and pass out for two hours. Jealous? Don't be, it comes with a sore throat, coughing, headache, body aches, and assorted other miseries. Be happy you can function.

Here we are - the end of March

It's been a busy (and stressful week). Mason got sick with what they think was the rotavirus (we never could confirm it) starting very early Monday morning. Between Derek and I, we didn't get enough sleep for one person, let alone two the whole week. Mason is now on the mend and kept everything down yesterday (Saturday) so we think he's over it. We are getting some very interesting diapers, but at least he's eating.

I went to the OB DR on Thursday since I was already at the hospital. I have been having ocntinuous headaches since last week. Tylenol which is the only thing I am allowed to take does not help, so I called first. All I wanted to know was "Is there something else I Can take?". Their answer was, "Come in." I didn't want to come in, I am thoroughly sick of the hospital. Unfortunately, I had too. The dr I saw diagnosed me with migraines (pregnancy related). My blood pressure was slightly elevated at first as well. It dropped, but this is the second time it's been high. Gee, could that be a problem?! Anyways, all I wanted was something I could take and still work. So she gives me Midrin which cuases DROWSINESS! I almost fell asleep at my desk. Oh yea, brilliant, Doc, now what am I supposed to do? My answer. . . no migraine meds for me, I'll just deal with the headaches, at least then I can function.

Derek is also been visiting the hospital a lot. He tore his ACL and his MCL and it looks like we are heading to surgery, possibly in May. He's not pleased. He also got his grades in from last term. He got an A and a C which he expected. He starts classes again tomorrow. He wants to do better this term, but we will see how it goes. His advisors are suitably impressed that being a father of three with a busy family he maintains such a good GPA (3.344). It is kind of impressive considering how much he doesn't want to be in school.

That's the bulk of our news. Just been busy caring for Mason and trying to make sure the other two don't get left out. Baby Thiem III is fine. Had an ultrasound done on Monday (the last one was a screening for Down's that the doc couldn't read so he wanted it re-done), the baby is fine. I saw a perfect image of a right foot with five cute little toes. THe tech also thought she saw a winky, though it was merely guess and can't be confirmed for another 6 weeks. Derek was thrilled. Can we say Shane COlton Thiem? I am still holding out some hope it was the umbilical cord or something, but after Mason's exhibitionist tendencies, I am afriad the tech saw the truth. I am not unhappy or disappointed, though another little girl would have been lovely. This way Mason will always have a playmate, I hope.

Mom knew what she was talking about - again

She said one time that you never really get over your parents dying. I can see that, becuase you know it hits you at the weirdest times, and I don't think it's becuase I am pregnant and emotional.

I mean, sitting at a stoplight where you had a conversation, or turning around in the grocery store and realizing she's not there, or trying to explain to someone who did not know her what a neat and unusual lady she was. And she was always a lady.

It's hard knowing that she's missing things that she would have been so excited about. Mason is crawling, actual tummy off the ground, not just scooting crawling. He's cruising too. I think he learned to crawl so he could get to the couch and pull himself up so he could cruise.

She's going to miss the last pregnancy and grandbaby, and yo uknow that's got to irk her. She loved getting her hands on the little ones. And she and Mason were buddies. He misses her I think.

In some ways, it hasn't really set in, but at other times, I just want to cry and cry. It's not because she's in pain or anything,I figure she's in heaven with an endless library, a computer with her favorite games, a tv where she doesn't share the remote, her crochetting, and the 4 babies I lost. So she's not lonely or sad. I am though, becuase I am selfish enough that I want her here with me, though not like she was at the end. I want her fighting with Derek and making intelligent conversation. I can't even be mad at God, who can blame him for wanting someone like Mom with him. It doesn't stop me from feeling a wee bit sad and missing her though.

Ranting - A Lot

OK, I know my mouth gets away from me sometimes, but c'mom, libel? Yes, you read me correctly, someone is trying to accuse me of libel! And what's really (really) funny, it's becuase I questioned (he felt) his integrity. Bit sensitive, are we? Perhaps he did do something he's feeling guilty over. Or perhaps, he doesn't like the fact that I control the purse strings and I am not willing to roll over and he's trying to get me fired. And guess what, my boss isn't firing me! But, oh, I am steamed! And I DO control the purse strings, and those strings are now completely closed to him! Never piss off the pregnant woman!

Have I not had enough turmoil inthe past two month without some jerk trying to play me? And he didn't even come to me, he went to my boss. How unprofessional is that? You know, I really would not mind being a stay at home Mom, but I don't have that option right now, so all I want to do is a good job. I have been being disgustingly nice to work with this jerk, knowing what he was about, and this is what I get. And you know what, I can hear them telling me now to just work with him and ignore his BS. THAT'S the PROBLEM - NO ONE calls him on his games and he gets away with it. So now I have to play toadie for this jerk. NOT! They put me in charge of the program, so guess what, I get to run it my way, which means being fair to everyone, and guess what else, I don't HAVE to include this guy anymore! Period. If they force me to, I will call a meeting with him and I will be more than happy to explain that we no longer need his "advice" as a technical advisor, and we will be happy to entertain his project proposals along with everyone else's when we do a call for projects. And guess what, as far as I am concerned, I can be unbiased, but for some reason, I don't think my program will fund ANYTHING of his!

OK, done venting. I have been percolating since Friday over this, so you can only imagine how hot I was then.

Life goes on

Yes, you still have to get up and function ever day. Feed kids, go to work, pay bills, etc. It's not always easy but we are doing it.

I have my first ultrasound this morning to see how far along I am, and make sure there is only one in there. I am just hoping everything is alright. Hey, with my history, I am bound to be a bit nervous, and the first 8 weeks or so of this pregnancy were pretty stressful. I am already showing signs of high blood pressure so I have to be careful.

There was plenty of work waiting for me when I got back. 5 weeks off tends to add up. I will be happy when I am caught up. Or maybe I never will be (sigh).

Derek is going into finals in the next few weeks. He's got a solid A in one class, but expects a Cin the other. He needs to see his advisor also to find out when he gets to graduate (or if he does).

We are doing ok overall. A lot going on as usual.

Surviving

Thank God for kids. You have to function for their sakes even when you really (really) don't want too. You have to get up, get them up, get them ready for school, feed them, make sure they have everything they need, and all of the other stuff.

But you know, there is a piece of me that is really lonely. I know I have a great husband (most days), three good children, and a fourth (hopefully only one) on the way, but with Mom passing on, their is a part of me that feels incomplete. She was special, really really special, and I miss her. I know I am going to come home from work one day brimming with news, and she won't be there, and it's going to hit me really hard. And you know, I know there's no way to make it easier. I remember Mom saying once that it can hurt just as much 20 years later as the day it happened.

I go back to work the week after next so I woll use this week to clean up the details of Mom's life. It's not fun. The kids will all be in school or daycare so it will be somewhat easier, but it's still not going to be fun. Necesary, but fun.

Oh, and yes, you read right, I am pregnant again. Oops! Looks like the next Thiem should be showing up in September. Yes, we are happy, but the doctor is worried since I have been under a lot of stress, sick with bronchitis, then stomach virus, and I still breastfeed. Other than that, no issues : ) I am trying to make sure I eat and take care of myself, but it's not very easy right now. There are so many details to take care of. And I am always tired.

Derek is doing ok. He really cared about Mom and this has been hard on him. He goes back to school on Tuesday and has dropped one class to make it easier on himself.

We have learned through this a couple of realistic things, aside from the painful soul searching which I am not ready to go into.

1.) Make sure your parents/friends/family have their affairs in order - NOW. Make sure they have liing wills, durable power of attorneys, and wills. It's not a fun conversation, but no matter who they choose to follow their wishes, make sure they have them specifically stated somewhere in a legal way. It makes everyone's life a lot easier and guilt-free.

2.)Make sure you have done the same.

I realize that I have not been my usual chatty self lately, but I have a good reason. Mom is in the hospital, seriously ill, so my time and energy have been focused elsewhere.

For those of you that know Mom, she had an abdominal blockage that required surgery. That was not the real problem. THe problem seems to have been surgery. They couldn't just fo a local, she had to have general anethesia which is particularly dangerous for someone with frail health. She came out of surgery and was talking and ok, but that night she started having breathing problems and her blood pressure dropped dangerously low.

That was last Monday, it's now Wednesday of the next week. She's been on a ventilator since then and a series of medication for blood pressure, water retention, blood surgar and a couple of other things. Her kidneys were not working well, so they started her on dialasys on Monday and she is now on dau three. It is helping, but she is still very puffy and they are keeping her sedated. Another cmplication is that it appears that Mom has some cirrhosis of the liver. The tests should be back in the next few days.

The nurse I spoke with last night seemed to think that the dialysis would jumpstart Mom's kidneys which is what needs to happen. I am not sure where we go from there since the focus is the kidney function right now.

Bear w/ Us

I know I have not written for a while, but things have been crazy. For right now, Mom is in the hospital for a bowel obstruction, so I am speanding my time being with her and dealing with things at home. THere isn't much time for anything else.

Hmm

When I opened this post, I had something I was going to talk about, but now that I am here, I cna't for the life of me remember what it was. Don't you hate when that happens? Is it a function of old age? Exhaustion? Stupidity?

Things are pretty quiet right now. Thankfully we got smart after last fall and toned down the schedule so that we aren't doing something EVERY FREAKING day. We actually sit down and eat at a decent time more often than not. What a concept!

We are planning Mercedes birthday party for Feb 4. Can you believe she's going to be 5? She's so excited about it. Then again, she thinks every party or holiday is her birthday. And we have absolutely no idea what to get her. Having just come through Christmas, there isn't much she didn't get. Now the greedy little soon to be 5 year old in her wants more stuff, but she really wouldn't notice if she didn't get a darn thing. I figure there's got to be a Scooby movie or two that she hasn't gotten yet. Her party is going to be at the YMCA pool with 30 of her closest friends. I don't think I am going to do the COlstone cake though. FOr one thing, I don't want to drive that far to pick it up. For another, the joy would be lost on the 5 year old of a nice ice cream cake. The 32 year old would be overjoyed, but it's not my birthday.

Ok, next week I start going to the gym two to three days a week. No, I don't want to. Yes, I will find excuses not to go, but I am hoping if I tell people they will guilt me into sticking with. I can come up with a million reasons not to go.

I really do not want to go to work this morning. I am so exhausted from three nights with very little sleep that I might just pour the coffee over my head. I broke down and did the real thing this morning too, no decaf. I figure Derek will need some help too. He had a migraine last night so he was up late and he kept me up late.

He really, REALLY, needs to see the neurosurgeon and get the neck surgery scheduled. He's having all sorts of issues becuase of it.